New Year, New Relationships

3 Jan

I almost had me a virgin.

Wait, let me rephrase that. I almost popped her cherry. No, that’s not right. I almost took her- no. I almost participated in her first shared erotic experience. That’s better. This was how I was going to start out my post about being with a virgin for the first time. We’ve talked before about virginity and giving value to breaking the hymen, and I thought it would be a good chance to open up that discussion again. But it never happened.

This was a girl I approached on Craig’sList. She was a bit(ok, a lot) younger than I, and there was nothing in her ad that blatantly said she would be open to dating a married man. But she was incredibly open minded, she replied and we almost instantly shared a very strong intellectual connection. We decided to meet, and the connection was still there in person. I was looking forward to sharing her first shared erotic experience. We got to second base. I wanted to take it slowly with her, easing into the experience. After we got to second base, she realized she wanted to do with me all those coupley things I could not do, and she was mature enough to recognize this. We ended things amicably.

Bayani in the meantime had found a new beaux. I guess after loosing Fanny(still friends, just no more sex) we both wanted a new relationship. We both have profiles on OkCupid, and she changed her account from ‘looking for bi girls’ to ‘looking for guys and girls’, and she was inundated with messages from horny men. I was a little taken aback by the difference in how these sites work for men vs women. Men are the active hunters, we have to put ourselves out there, searching for women and messaging them, trying valiantly to set ourselves apart from the hordes of other creepy internet perverts. She was able to simply sit back and sift through the chaff.

She found one, several actually, but one stood out. Let’s call him Beauregard. They met, and she fell in love. I was taken aback by the speed at which they connected, at the enthusiasm she showed for this new guy. I have adjusted now, and they are having a lot of fun together. She is totally twitterpated.

Meeting him was interesting, I like the guy, and was surprised to find I had virtually no negative emotions from our first meeting.

Beauregard is married, and his wife has been very accommodating. She even took the kids(ours and theirs) out for pizza so Bayani and Beau could have some alone time.

After their first time I was able to withhold my probing questions for a few days, to allow her to process things first.

I had some initial reactions to the frequency with witch they meet, but have realized that those are mostly my subconscious attempting to maintain a sense of control. I am learning to let go, to not get in the way of her relationship, and she is being patient with me as I do so.

And then I met Hildegarde.

I was contacting a number of women on OkCupid, talking to a few but none stood out. This one cutie caught my attention, though there wasn’t really anything in her profile indicating she was polyamorous. Maybe she just seemed open minded. So for the second time in as many months I contacted a woman who did not at first appear open to dating a married man. And for the second time, I had found a woman who was incredibly open minded, and who replied.

We connected, and decided to meet. She plays Dungeons and Dragons, she has opinions on which Dr Who is the best Doctor, and we argued for an hour over weather Superman was a better hero than Batman. I backed the Bat, btw, as he does everything Superman does, only without super powers.

The sexual tension between was palpable.

It did not take long for us to want to have sex, and Bayani stepped up and offered to take the kids out of the house for a few hours for us. She also wanted to meet this girl who had me all flustered.

That did not go well.

Oh, the sex was spectacular. It seems that Bayani had been holding off some jealousy for the past year or so, repressing it, and coming face to face with this new woman brought it all to the surface. I could tell she was uncomfortable meeting Hilde, so I took her out to see the chickens while Bayani got the kids out of the house.

Bayani assures me she is fine now. And no, I did not just go ahead and fuck another woman while my wife ran out of the house crying. She didn’t cry till she got to Beau’s house. I took Hilde out to lunch first, and I was not willing to take her home till Bayani could promise me she was or would be fine. She did, and is. This was a new experience for her. Before this all of our partners were either shared, or were existing friend relationships that grew to include sexual intimacy. This was the first woman I had met entirely on my own, entirely separate from her world.

Things are going well with each of these new relationships at the moment. I don’t know how long either will last, so we are just enjoying them while we can.

I will write more about each of these relationships, and our reactions to them, but for now this little update will have to do.

It’s funny, for months not much has been happening that is worth writing about, and suddenly here we are with two new people in our life and a whole lot to write about.

A new year, with new relationships, new drama, new personal growth.

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2 Responses to “New Year, New Relationships”

  1. I Can't Think Of A Clever Moniker January 6, 2012 at 3:34 pm #

    I was glad to have read this. I am immeasurably happy you found a Hildegarde. I haven’t forgotten that I still owe you some feedback. Happy new year and happy new beginnings.

    – The Virgin

    • Myrddwn January 6, 2012 at 9:54 pm #

      Welcome to the Coffee House ICantThinkOfACleverMoniker! Glad you could stop by!
      Yes dear readers, the poster above is the aforementioned Virgin from my post. And the feedback she owes me is on a pair of my short stories, nothing sex-related, sorry.

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