Did I Really Just Do That?

19 Aug

My wife Bayani is currently enjoying the highs and lows of a new relationship.

Well, she is enjoying the highs(and so am I-a heightened libido), but at the same time she has found that there are, in fact, low points that she must suffer through. I am also suffering.

Hew new beaux Abernethy has two other girlfriends, and a job and a life, and does not always have time for her.

She does not like being turned down.

She gets pensive and pouty and insecure.

And who does she turn to when Abernethy rejects her?

Me.

Now, she and I have been together almost twenty years, and in that time she has not had to deal with rejection. She is not some jaded veteran of the dating scene. This was new to her. She let herself get excited about this new relationship, she opened herself to it completely, so of course she would feel insecure when he rejected her, even just for a night. I understand this completely. I still don’t like it.

I wrote a previous post about how on one particular night I wanted her to choose him over me, and how she felt that was unfair, and about our blow-job centric compromise. I didn’t get my blow job, she didn’t get laid, but everybody seemed happy. Except he had dared to turn her down that night. She pouted. She sulked. She worried that he didn’t want her any more. Then a couple days later, a Sunday I believe, I saw an opportunity for her to hook up with him. I suggested she call him for sex, even though I wanted it that night to.

Did I really just suggest my wife call one of her other lovers for sex?

Yes, I did. She needed it. She needed to be reassured that he did, in fact, want her. She felt better, so I felt better, and I KNOW he felt better.

Then it happened again.

This was while I was with Germintrude(I mean Kasini) for the first time, and Bayani was on a ritual high and in dire need of some serious sex. She called Abernethy first, who had just five minutes earlier agreed to meet one of his other girls. Bayani’s heart fell. She called Fanny next, who was more than happy to play.

But the damage was done.

Abernethy had once again rejected Bayani’s advances.

And once again guess who came to the rescue?

Long suffering Myrddwn.

This time it was a thursday. Bayani skates with a local Roller Derby League, and after their thursday practice they sometimes head over to a local bar. Now, sometimes she comes home to me at 2 am and wakes me up with her lips wrapped deliciously around my cock. Sometimes she hangs out with Abernethy where they talk and kiss and talk and kiss. But this particular day, I was seriously in the mood to fuck my wife. So I told her that I would like her to come home to me. But she was still reeling from Abernethy’s rejection days earlier.

Crap.

So once again, I stepped up an encouraged her to go fuck another dude.

The things I do for my wife.

I deserve a medal.

Don’t worry, I got mine eventually. Monday was the day before her birthday, and Abe had offered to take her out. This time, I told her that I wanted her to choose me over him. I wanted her to come home from her date to fuck me. Part of me didn’t care if she screwed him first as long as I got mine, but I really, and I mean REALLY, do not like the smell of another man on her. Turns me off big time. Smell of a woman, well, the only time she comes home with the smell of another woman is with Fanny, who is also my lover. So smelling my lover on my lover is rather nice. But not the smell of a dude. And to be honest, it is partially that I wanted her to choose me over him. So I asked her to, and she did, and I was happy. I know she was happy.

Abe, well, he could make himself happy that night for all I cared, he owed me a few.

Polyamory at its best. Sometimes you have to understand that there are other people involved, whose needs are more important than your own. And sometimes, you have to just give in to your own needs, and everybody else can suck it.

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12 Responses to “Did I Really Just Do That?”

  1. Kasini August 19, 2011 at 10:21 pm #

    I find this so interesting because I never want to give into my own needs. Which isn’t healthy, I know. I KNOW GEEZ.

    But you. Poor you. So sex starved. You hear that sound? That, my friend, is the sound of the world’s tiniest violin…

    • Myrddwn August 20, 2011 at 12:17 am #

      Hey, I’m trying to generate some sympathy from our readers here, they don’t know that I get it pretty much daily from Bayanni. Besides, that is not the point.
      Yes, sometimes you just have to give in to your own needs and wants. And there is nothing wrong with that.

      • Kasini August 20, 2011 at 7:44 am #

        I’m pretty sure that by now they can tell you get it pretty much every day. Sometimes multiple times a day. .. I can still hear the strains of the world’s saddest song floating in the breeze…

      • Myrddwn August 20, 2011 at 9:39 am #

        So just because I get it almost every day, does that automatically mean I should be happy when she chooses to screw another man over me? Damn, should have said ‘instead’ rather than ‘over’…

      • Kasini August 20, 2011 at 10:21 am #

        I don’t know. Emotions aren’t rational. And I’m also not telling you how to feel or what you should feel, because I, myself, deal with feelings in ways that few people seem to understand and even fewer people seem to think is healthy. For me, what’s important is behavior and motivation. Your motivation is for the best balance of happiness for you and Bayani, and I think that’s pretty great. Your behavior, is collaborative and team-like which is admirable. It’s those streaks of what I (gender-biasedly, I’m sure) identify as masculine competitiveness that show up every once in a while that make me shake my head sagely and tsk tsk tsk at you from over here in La Villa di Perfezione and the oh-so-slight tinge of whining that urges me to flick you a little extra harder when I give you that gold star on the forehead…

      • Myrddwn August 20, 2011 at 10:36 am #

        Yes, I am a product of my cultural programing, and masculine competitiveness is a part of behavior and motivation. I am one awesome dood, what can I say?
        I really am happy she has this opportunity to explore her sexuality and to enjoy herself. But I don’t have to like missing out on things myself.
        As for the oh-so-slight tinge of whining, well, maybe I just wanted some attention….

  2. bayanni August 20, 2011 at 6:20 pm #

    I think that you get PLENTY of attention Myr. You have three gorgeous lovers, okay, well two gorgeous lovers and a wife that’s not bad… you’re getting daily sex, and many days twice.
    You are one awesome dood, and I love you, but sometimes I need a little something different, or you’re too tired, or have something else planned. Abe’s no competition. You know I like him a lot, but I LOVE you. Thanks for being your awesome self.

    • Myrddwn August 20, 2011 at 6:35 pm #

      Why do people think my whining is serious? I DO get plenty of attention, from three gorgeous lovers. I am a lucky, lucky man.
      How little, or how much, sex I get is irrelevant; those times she chose him over me were uncomfortable. I am simply not hiding from that uncomfortable, I am embracing it. I am acknowledging it, digesting it. And moving on.
      I repeat: I really am happy she has this opportunity to explore her sexuality and to enjoy herself. But I don’t have to like missing out on things myself.

    • Kasini August 21, 2011 at 4:22 pm #

      hey now, HEY NOW. If I’m not allowed to put myself down, YOU ARE CERTAINLY NOT ALLOWED EITHER.

      I saw you all tartaned up. You’re better than “not bad”

      • Myrddwn August 21, 2011 at 4:35 pm #

        You’re both hot, so shut up.

  3. bayanni August 20, 2011 at 8:04 pm #

    Myr, baby, you’re rarely serious. We know that about you. The sub-context in my comment is lost.
    I am glad you are dealing with the uncomfortable. I have my own uncomfortable moments, and am processing them as well.

    • Myrddwn August 21, 2011 at 1:28 am #

      Well then, I trust that just as I won’t let mine stop you, you won’t let your stop me.

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